圖書標籤: 育兒 Parenting 英文原版 教育 心理學 教育理念 Education 傢庭
发表于2025-06-04
UNCONDITIONAL PARENTING Moving from Rewards and Pu pdf epub mobi txt 電子書 下載 2025
Most parenting guides begin with the question "How can we get kids to do what they're told?" and then proceed to offer various techniques for controlling them. In this truly groundbreaking book, nationally respected educator Alfie Kohn begins instead by asking, "What do kids need - and how can we meet those needs?" What follows from that quetion are ideas for working with children rather than doing things to them.
One basic need all children have, Kohn argues, is to be loved unconditionally, to know that they will be accepted even if they screw up or fall short. Yet conventional approaches to parenting such as punishments (including "time-outs"), rewards (including positive reinforcement), and other forms of control teach children that they are loved only when they please us or impress us. Kohn cites a body of powerful, and largely unknown, research detailing the damage caused by leading children to believe they must earn our approval. That's precisely the message children derive from common discipline techniques, even though it's not the message most parents intend to send.
More than just another book about discipline, though, Unconditional Parenting addresses the ways parents think about, feel about, and act with their children. It invites them to question their most basic assumptions about raising kids while offering a wealth of practical strategies for shifting from "doing to" to "working with" parenting - including how to replace praise with the unconditional support that children need to grow into healthy, caring, responsible people. This is an eye-opening, paradigm-shattering book that will reconnect readers to their own best instincts and inspire them to become better parents.
Alfie Kohn is the author of nine previous books, including Punished by Rewards and The Schools Our Children Deserve, that have helped to shape the thinking of parents and educators across the country and abroad. He lectures widely and lives (actually) with his family in the Boston are and (virtually) at www.alfiekohn.org.
一,作為父母,無條件地愛孩子,是由於ta是你的孩子,而不是由於ta做瞭哪些可以讓你自豪的事。這種無條件的愛,既不是溺愛,也不是對你的孩子市恩市義(所謂養育之恩,即屬市恩市義)。二,做齣恰當決定的能力需要從幼年一點點培養、曆練,並讓孩子瞭解每一項決定都與責任的承擔有關。學習做齣恰當決定的途徑,恰恰是通過做決定本身,而非通過聽從他人指導。三,要有勇氣、有能力麵對和質疑自己的養育經曆以及被養育的經曆。是的,人通常不願意質疑自己、質疑自己親近的人,尤其是自己父母。但誰都不是完人,包括你和你父母,所以,隻要用心,一定會找到可以改進的地方,使自己變得更好並嘗試做更好的父母。
評分One of the best parenting books I've ever read. Answered most of my questions regarding discipline. I have changed my old practices and need to revise my previous writings.
評分一,作為父母,無條件地愛孩子,是由於ta是你的孩子,而不是由於ta做瞭哪些可以讓你自豪的事。這種無條件的愛,既不是溺愛,也不是對你的孩子市恩市義(所謂養育之恩,即屬市恩市義)。二,做齣恰當決定的能力需要從幼年一點點培養、曆練,並讓孩子瞭解每一項決定都與責任的承擔有關。學習做齣恰當決定的途徑,恰恰是通過做決定本身,而非通過聽從他人指導。三,要有勇氣、有能力麵對和質疑自己的養育經曆以及被養育的經曆。是的,人通常不願意質疑自己、質疑自己親近的人,尤其是自己父母。但誰都不是完人,包括你和你父母,所以,隻要用心,一定會找到可以改進的地方,使自己變得更好並嘗試做更好的父母。
評分一,作為父母,無條件地愛孩子,是由於ta是你的孩子,而不是由於ta做瞭哪些可以讓你自豪的事。這種無條件的愛,既不是溺愛,也不是對你的孩子市恩市義(所謂養育之恩,即屬市恩市義)。二,做齣恰當決定的能力需要從幼年一點點培養、曆練,並讓孩子瞭解每一項決定都與責任的承擔有關。學習做齣恰當決定的途徑,恰恰是通過做決定本身,而非通過聽從他人指導。三,要有勇氣、有能力麵對和質疑自己的養育經曆以及被養育的經曆。是的,人通常不願意質疑自己、質疑自己親近的人,尤其是自己父母。但誰都不是完人,包括你和你父母,所以,隻要用心,一定會找到可以改進的地方,使自己變得更好並嘗試做更好的父母。
評分One of the best parenting books I've ever read. Answered most of my questions regarding discipline. I have changed my old practices and need to revise my previous writings.
没有任何一种教育方式适合所有的孩子, 在看了大量的育儿书籍后,那些教育上的技巧在刚开始被建立,后来又逐渐被推翻,比如在《超级育儿师》系列节目被频繁用到的"time out"(爱的暂停)方法曾经红极一时,后来又出现大量的理论和实例去推翻这种做法。 因为有这种经历的孩子为...
評分所有父母对孩子都是有爱的,但怎么爱,通过什么样的方式去爱,不是每个人都能从开始就选择正确的路径的。 我们被养育的过程中,一般都会被赋予各种各样的象征意义,比如要拿第一,比如要给父母争光,比如。。。 所以,全部摒弃自己受到而内化的经验,是一件不容易的事,毕竟几...
評分开篇是不错的,说了很多别的书籍没有说的东西,而且又是那么的正对我意。一直以来我都觉得子女对父母的爱来的更加无私,不管我的爸爸妈妈做了什么,我都会爱他们,因为他们是我的爸爸妈妈。甚至在我看电视看到坏人的时候,我都会假想一下,如果这个十恶不赦的人是我爸爸或者妈...
評分有条件养育下成长的我,如何无条件养育自己的孩子? 这是我从小就在思考的问题,当然彼时还不晓得「有条件」「无条件」的概念,只是困惑,「幼时在暴烈环境下幸存的人,未来可能对自己的孩子温柔以待吗?」听闻过太多不幸的宿命循环,对这个问题自然格外观照。 接触到「无条件...
評分感觉是白左那一套,鼓吹父母和儿童要平权。 一、不能惩罚 1.1. 体罚不用说了 1.2. 批评是精神惩罚 1.3 连被普遍接受的timeout,即犯错之后双规自省,都被质疑为“爱的剥夺” 二、不能赞赏 2.1 物质奖励,是过早把市场机制引入家庭,谈钱伤感情,扭曲心理。 2.2 口头表扬,潜台...
UNCONDITIONAL PARENTING Moving from Rewards and Pu pdf epub mobi txt 電子書 下載 2025