图书标签: 育儿 Parenting 英文原版 教育 心理学 教育理念 Education 家庭
发表于2024-12-25
UNCONDITIONAL PARENTING Moving from Rewards and Pu pdf epub mobi txt 电子书 下载 2024
Most parenting guides begin with the question "How can we get kids to do what they're told?" and then proceed to offer various techniques for controlling them. In this truly groundbreaking book, nationally respected educator Alfie Kohn begins instead by asking, "What do kids need - and how can we meet those needs?" What follows from that quetion are ideas for working with children rather than doing things to them.
One basic need all children have, Kohn argues, is to be loved unconditionally, to know that they will be accepted even if they screw up or fall short. Yet conventional approaches to parenting such as punishments (including "time-outs"), rewards (including positive reinforcement), and other forms of control teach children that they are loved only when they please us or impress us. Kohn cites a body of powerful, and largely unknown, research detailing the damage caused by leading children to believe they must earn our approval. That's precisely the message children derive from common discipline techniques, even though it's not the message most parents intend to send.
More than just another book about discipline, though, Unconditional Parenting addresses the ways parents think about, feel about, and act with their children. It invites them to question their most basic assumptions about raising kids while offering a wealth of practical strategies for shifting from "doing to" to "working with" parenting - including how to replace praise with the unconditional support that children need to grow into healthy, caring, responsible people. This is an eye-opening, paradigm-shattering book that will reconnect readers to their own best instincts and inspire them to become better parents.
Alfie Kohn is the author of nine previous books, including Punished by Rewards and The Schools Our Children Deserve, that have helped to shape the thinking of parents and educators across the country and abroad. He lectures widely and lives (actually) with his family in the Boston are and (virtually) at www.alfiekohn.org.
One of the best parenting books I've ever read. Answered most of my questions regarding discipline. I have changed my old practices and need to revise my previous writings.
评分一,作为父母,无条件地爱孩子,是由于ta是你的孩子,而不是由于ta做了哪些可以让你自豪的事。这种无条件的爱,既不是溺爱,也不是对你的孩子市恩市义(所谓养育之恩,即属市恩市义)。二,做出恰当决定的能力需要从幼年一点点培养、历练,并让孩子了解每一项决定都与责任的承担有关。学习做出恰当决定的途径,恰恰是通过做决定本身,而非通过听从他人指导。三,要有勇气、有能力面对和质疑自己的养育经历以及被养育的经历。是的,人通常不愿意质疑自己、质疑自己亲近的人,尤其是自己父母。但谁都不是完人,包括你和你父母,所以,只要用心,一定会找到可以改进的地方,使自己变得更好并尝试做更好的父母。
评分一,作为父母,无条件地爱孩子,是由于ta是你的孩子,而不是由于ta做了哪些可以让你自豪的事。这种无条件的爱,既不是溺爱,也不是对你的孩子市恩市义(所谓养育之恩,即属市恩市义)。二,做出恰当决定的能力需要从幼年一点点培养、历练,并让孩子了解每一项决定都与责任的承担有关。学习做出恰当决定的途径,恰恰是通过做决定本身,而非通过听从他人指导。三,要有勇气、有能力面对和质疑自己的养育经历以及被养育的经历。是的,人通常不愿意质疑自己、质疑自己亲近的人,尤其是自己父母。但谁都不是完人,包括你和你父母,所以,只要用心,一定会找到可以改进的地方,使自己变得更好并尝试做更好的父母。
评分One of the best parenting books I've ever read. Answered most of my questions regarding discipline. I have changed my old practices and need to revise my previous writings.
评分车轱辘话翻来倒去的说,真的很佩服老外。不过这个概念我非常接受
做了2年多爸爸以后,我越来越质疑自己对孩子的教育理念,正是起于感觉到自己频繁使用“胡萝卜+大棒” 。举个例子,每天早上孩子刷牙洗脸是件很折磨的事情,明明3分钟就可以完成的,总要托个半小时。时间来得及时还好,早上如果要上课或者出去,就很容易起冲突。 我之前的解决方...
评分做了2年多爸爸以后,我越来越质疑自己对孩子的教育理念,正是起于感觉到自己频繁使用“胡萝卜+大棒” 。举个例子,每天早上孩子刷牙洗脸是件很折磨的事情,明明3分钟就可以完成的,总要托个半小时。时间来得及时还好,早上如果要上课或者出去,就很容易起冲突。 我之前的解决方...
评分很多时候我们在和孩子相处过程中依靠的是一种惯性,依靠着是自己身上从父辈身上承袭下的经验;却很少静下来反思一下这些方式都是对的吗?特别很多时候我们在生活的轨道上疲于应付,孩子往往成了导致情绪崩溃的最后一根稻草。我们会咆哮,会愤怒,会后悔,会懊恼,但下次周而复...
评分开篇是不错的,说了很多别的书籍没有说的东西,而且又是那么的正对我意。一直以来我都觉得子女对父母的爱来的更加无私,不管我的爸爸妈妈做了什么,我都会爱他们,因为他们是我的爸爸妈妈。甚至在我看电视看到坏人的时候,我都会假想一下,如果这个十恶不赦的人是我爸爸或者妈...
评分这本书写的观点一下子让人是有些接受不了,但是如果再把自己想像成一个孩子,就是明白确实就是这么回事。父母总是说爱孩子,所做的一切都是为了孩子。但是孩子的真实感受是什么?他需要的是什么? 如果我们爱孩子,为什么孩子感觉到的却是痛苦,难堪,自己的无用,不存在感。难...
UNCONDITIONAL PARENTING Moving from Rewards and Pu pdf epub mobi txt 电子书 下载 2024