Tedious Tipsette Survival Quiz 169Deathly Documentslien Abduction 174 Your Boring BodyPeriodontitis 179 Deathly Documentseffect Cup of Coffee 184 Tedious TipsSafety Instructions 185issions to Web Page ~9oPermissions 19IntroductionIT's 4:28 X.M~the sixteenth straight night of sleeplessness andI'm going insane. My hopes were high at midnight when I setthe alarm, turned off the light, and settled under the coversia the desperate hope of drifting off into that blessed state ofoblivion. My first few nights of insomnia were frustrating, buthardly reason for contemplating suicide. I tossed and turned,checked and rechecked the time, turned on CNN HeadlineNon, switched to the Home Shopping Network, read Peoplemagazine cover to cover, ate sugar pops out of the box, and finallyreigned myself to a lousy night's sleep. I had a lot on my mind. Deadlines loomed, two kids to pack0ffto camp, a malingering romance, an outstanding root canalbill How could anyone sleep with that kind of stress?~Week Two I started to panic. My bedtime rituals became complex: Adjust the pillow exactly so, prop my teddy against the headboard, read twelve pages of anything from:i~uler's Digest, turn off the light, turn on the light, log on to Depressed Jehovah's Witness web site, stumble back to bed recite the mantra I was given by my hippie boyfriend in (aiiiiiiing--I know you're supposed to keep it secret).leei Three I walked around in a stupor. I consulted a psychic,~an acupuncturist, read my horoscope, and had my astrologi-