We rely on science to tell us everything from what to eat to when and how long to exercise, but what about relationships? Is there a scientific explanation for why some people seem to navigate relationships effortlessly, while others struggle? According to psychiatrist and neuroscientist Dr. Amir Levine and Rachel Heller, the answer is a resounding "yes." In "Attached," Levine and Heller reveal how an understanding of adult attachment-the most advanced relationship science in existence today-can help us find and sustain love. Pioneered by psychologist John Bowlby in the 1950s, the field of attachment posits that each of us behaves in relationships in one of three distinct ways:
*Anxious people are often preoccupied with their relationships and tend to worry about their partner's ability to love them back
*Avoidant people equate intimacy with a loss of independence and constantly try to minimize closeness.
*Secure people feel comfortable with intimacy and are usually warm and loving. In this book Levine and Heller guide readers in determining what attachment style they and their mate (or potential mate) follow, offering a road map for building stronger, more fulfilling connections with the people they love.
Amir Levine, M.D. is an adult, child, and adolescent psychiatrist and neuroscientist. He graduated from the residency program at New York Presbyterian Hospital/Columbia University and for the past few years Amir has been conducting neuroscience research at Columbia under the mentorship of Nobel Prize Laureate Eric Kandel. Amir also has a passion for working with patients and it is in this context, while working with mothers and children in a therapeutic nursery, that he first discovered the power of attachment theory. His clinical work together with his deep understanding of the brain from a neuroscientist's perspective contribute to his appreciation of attachment theory and its remarkable effectiveness in helping to heal patients. Amir lives in New York City. Rachel Heller, M.A. studied at Columbia University with some of the most prominent scholars in the field of social psychology. She now works with families and couples as a psychologist in private practice. Rachel lives in Israel.
“他不秒回信息,我就感觉被抛弃了。” ”我越黏他,他就跑得越远。” “他总是对我忽冷忽热,若即若离。” ”我总担心分手后,就再也没有人会爱上我。” 在日常生活中,我们都听身边的人说过类似的话,自己可能也遇过类似的问题。爱情就是这样,让人迷恋又让人迷惑。他到底怎...
评分 评分Attachment styles Secure: comfortable with intimacy and are usually warm and loving Anxious: crave intimacy, are often preoccupied with their relationships, and tend to worry about their partner’s ability to love them back Avoidant: equate intimacy with a ...
interesting
评分心理类书籍一大作用便是帮助人们了解自己了解他人,很多时候问题都在于并不理解对方的行为、出发点、心理过程,多一份理解或许就是多一份包容的可能,倒也并不一定就是为了解决问题。况且很多时候问题其实就只是:你不理解我我不理解你,不是我不想理解你而是我不知道怎么用我自己的方式角度来理解你。
评分“Remember, an activated attachment system is not passionate love.”
评分Activated attachment system is not love.
评分不同意作者的分类。焦虑型和回避型在同一个人身上是可以切换的,关键就看你多在乎对方了。
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