Can you love more than one person? Have multiple romantic partners, without jealousy or cheating? Absolutely! Polyamorous people have been paving the way, through trial and painful error. Now the new book More Than Two can help you find your own way. With completely new material and a fresh approach, Franklin Veaux and Eve Rickert wrote More Than Two to expand on and update the themes and ideas in the wildly popular polyamory website morethantwo.com.
From Ancient Greece through the many dynasties of China to current practices of non-monogamy, people have openly engaged in multiple intimate relationships. Not until the late 20th century, however, was a word coined that encapsulated the practice, as well as its philosophies, edicts and ethics: polyamory (poly = many + amore = love).
For Franklin Veaux, who has been polyamorous for his entire adult life, the emerging framework and subsequent vocabulary for his lifestyle was a light in the dark. Candidly sharing his experiences and thoughts online catapulted his website morethantwo.com, among the first dedicated to the poly lifestyle, to one of the top-ranking on the subject.
In recent years, as more people have discovered polyamory as a legitimate and desirable option for how they conduct their relationships, Franklin and one of his partners, Eve Rickert, saw that there was a growing need for a comprehensive guide to the lifestyle. More Than Two is that guide.
This wide-ranging resource explores the often-complex world of living polyamorously: the nuances (no, this isn't swinging), the relationship options (do you suit a V, an N, an open network?), the myths (don't count on wild orgies and endless sex but don't rule them out either!) and the expectations (communication, transparency and trust are paramount). More Than Two is entirely without judgment and peppered with a good dose of humor. In it the authors share not only their hard-won philosophies about polyamory, but also their hurts and embarrassments. Living poly is not always an easy road, and they hope that by reading this book, you'll avoid some of the mistakes they've made along the way.
Challenging the notion of what society considers a healthy and successful relationship, they offer up personal stories from their own lives as well as of those in the wider poly world, emphasizing that this lifestyle choice isn't for the noncommittal. Polyamory is all about the relationships and the individuals participating. Charting a Relationship Bill of Rights, the authors underscore the importance of engaging in ethical polyamory and guide readers through the thorny issues of jealousy and insecurity with the aim of encouraging readers to work consistently and conscientiously on both their relationships and themselves.
And no, they're not trying to convert you: they know that polyamory isn't for everyone. Veaux and Rickert simply provide those who might be embarking on this lifestyle or those who have always known they are poly with a set of tools and many questions to help them make informed decisions and set them on a path to enjoying multiple happy, strong, enriching relationships.
More Than Two is the book the polyamory community has been waiting for. And who knows? It may just be the book you didn't even know you were waiting for.
Franklin Veaux has been ideologically polyamorous his entire life, functionally polyamorous since 1984, and writing about polyamory since 1998. Monogamy has never made much sense to him. (When he heard a fairy tale about a princess forced to choose between two handsome princes, he thought “everyone knows princesses live in castles And castles are big enough for both princes. So why does she have to choose?”)
He started practicing non-monogamy from the moment he started becoming aware that boys and girls are different. Along the way, he's made just about every mistake it’s possible to make in polyamorous relationships. Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from poor judgment.
Today, he has five partners, lives in Portland, Oregon, and spends a great deal of time writing about everything from relationship ethics to transhumanism to computer security.
Eve Rickert is a professional writer, editor and mastermind, and the co-author, with Franklin Veaux, of the newly released polyamory book More Than Two. Until taking time off from life to write the book, she co-organized a group for poly women in Vancouver, Canada and she blogs at the More Than Two website. She owns a science communications firm in Vancouver, Canada, called Talk Science to Me.
Eve has been living poly since 2008, though her poly roots go back much deeper. Her approach to poly has changed radically over the years: from early experiences in high school, to first hearing the word “polyamory” in 1998, to first swingers’ party in 2006, to her current three long-term relationships. And being poly has radically changed her. She's made a lot of mistakes and learned a lot of hard lessons. She co-wrote More Than Two to share those experiences with anyone who is struggling to maintain ethical multiple relationships with integrity, compassion and courage.
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我必须承认,这本书的语言风格非常独特,甚至可以说是有些“古典”的味道,句子结构冗长而富有韵律感,初读时需要集中精力去解析每一个从句和修饰语,但一旦适应了这种语感,就会发现它带来的阅读享受是其他快节奏作品无法比拟的。作者对场景的描绘达到了近乎于绘画的程度,每一个角落、每一件物品的摆放,似乎都经过精心设计,服务于特定的情绪表达。举个例子,书中对一场雨夜的描写,长达数页,却丝毫不让人觉得拖沓,反而让人清晰地感受到那种潮湿、阴冷和无可逃避的宿命感。这种对细节的极致追求,使得整个故事的质感非常厚重、坚实,让人感觉自己触摸到了故事的骨架。对于那些追求文学性、喜欢沉浸在优美文字中体验阅读的读者来说,这本书绝对是一次不容错过的盛宴。
评分这本书的魅力在于它的开放性。它没有提供清晰的答案,也没有强硬地要求读者接受某种观点,相反,它抛出了一系列引人深思的问题,然后将解释的空间完全留给了读者自己。不同的人在不同的生命阶段阅读,可能会得出截然不同的结论,这正是它生命力旺盛的地方。我最欣赏的是作者对“模糊地带”的捕捉能力,很多角色都不是简单的善恶二元对立,他们的动机复杂,行为充满了矛盾性,你很难完全去谴责或赞扬任何一个人。每一次重读,我都会发现一些之前忽略掉的细微之处,它们像是隐藏在文本深处的线索,引导着我走向一个新的理解层面。这种需要读者主动参与到意义建构过程中的写作方式,让阅读不再是被动的接收,而是一场持续的对话,非常具有智力上的挑战性和满足感。
评分这本作品最让我震撼的是它对社会现象的批判力度,虽然没有直接点名道姓,但那种对体制、对群体无意识的讽刺,是如此精准和入木三分。作者似乎拥有一种洞察一切的冷峻目光,他冷静地描绘着世界运转的残酷逻辑,却没有流于肤浅的控诉,而是将这份思考融入到每个角色的命运之中。我感觉自己像是一个站在高处俯瞰众生的观察者,看着那些遵循既定规则运行的齿轮,偶尔会发出令人心寒的摩擦声。书中的一些场景设置极具象征意义,比如那个反复出现的空旷广场,或者那扇永远关不紧的门,都指向了某种更宏大、更难以捉摸的主题。这种将个体悲欢置于宏大背景下的叙事手法,极大地提升了作品的格局,使得它不仅仅是个人的故事,而是关乎我们所有人的寓言。
评分说实话,这本书的开篇节奏稍微有点慢,但只要坚持读过前三分之一,那种独特的魅力就会逐渐显现出来。它没有那种直白的冲突和激烈的场面,而是通过大量的细节描写和人物间微妙的对话张力来推动情节,营造出一种压抑而又充满张力的氛围。作者的文字功底毋庸置疑,遣词造句极其讲究,尤其擅长运用比喻和象征,将抽象的情感具象化,让读者能够清晰地感受到角色在特定情境下的挣扎与挣脱。我特别欣赏作者对于时间流逝的处理方式,它不是线性的,而是常常在回忆和现实之间跳跃,这种非线性叙事反而更好地展现了人物心境的复杂性,仿佛我们跟随主角一起,在记忆的迷宫中探寻真相。这本书更像是一部慢炖的佳肴,需要细细品味,才能领略到其中层次丰富的味道,初读可能会觉得有些晦涩,但一旦进入状态,就会被其深邃的内涵所深深吸引。
评分这本书的叙事视角转换得非常巧妙,读起来有一种身临其境的代入感。作者对于人物内心世界的刻画,细腻得让人拍案叫绝,每一个转折点都似乎是角色命运的必然,却又带着强烈的宿命感。我尤其喜欢它对环境氛围的烘托,那种光影的微妙变化,似乎都在无声地预示着即将到来的风暴。故事的主线看似波澜不惊,实则暗流涌动,很多埋下的伏笔在后半部分才徐徐展开,让人不得不重新审视之前读到的所有情节,这种精妙的结构设计,体现了作者高超的掌控力。阅读过程中,我好几次停下来,仅仅是为了回味某一个段落的措辞,那种文字的质感,如同上好的丝绸,触手可及,又带着某种不易察觉的锋利。它不只是一个简单的故事,更像是一次对人性复杂性的深度解剖,探讨了选择与代价之间的永恒命题,让人读完后久久不能平静,需要时间去消化其中蕴含的深刻哲理。
评分现状挺有用,其他的都是旧话了
评分现状挺有用,其他的都是旧话了
评分现状挺有用,其他的都是旧话了
评分超棒的一本书,适合所有人读。不仅仅是关于多角关系(polyamory),里面的很多建议适用于所有的relationship,且不仅限于romantic relationship.必读。
评分现状挺有用,其他的都是旧话了
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